My Mind’s Captor

I go home each day And make the conscious choice to Not take my own life Some days it’s easy To shake those terrible thoughts But most days it’s not My mind’s captor is Cunning and cruel but I won’t Go down so easy SWD 10/2019 Advertisements

My Thousand Yard Stare

I would depict my consciousness As a smaller version of me Sitting behind my eyes’ lenses Observing everything they see I would depict my anxiety As a grey and monstrous storm Lying dormant in the shadows Until something upsets the norm Then with lightening in its veins And gangling long appendages It wraps up my…

Antidepressants

I carry these pills Like the tin man’s oil can Constantly am I Reminded of my Rusty edges and hollow Disconsolate chest SWD 01/2018 Updated 06/2019

Silence

Silence used to scare me And the way it can fill a room But as my head sinks into the bath The water plugs my ears Surrounding sounds are suppressed And my malicious mind is muffled I realise silence is all I’ve wanted SWD 04/2019

4 Minutes

8:15am Questions set before me “In the past few weeks, have you wished you were dead?” Rolls off my tongue but litters my head Anxiously awaiting an answer   “Yes.” Breathe Move on   We’ve all asked ourselves this one “Have you wished you were never born?” With only few years lived They still said…

Nylon Rope

Above my head Like a clever joke Hanging limply Was a nylon rope Out the window Like a bird set free My hope had flown And abandoned me Out of the blue Like a miracle Advice you gave Was empirical I heard your words “Friend, please stay alive” Then tied that noose Around my mind…

Thoughts Come Knocking

Thoughts come knocking at my mind Good, bad and even suicidal That latter had been visiting more and more I tried my best not to open the door But they often broke into my home anyway Angry for not listening to what they wanted to say Tearing down everything to retaliate Leaving me wrecked and…

Miss Motivation

Miss Motivation How is your vacation? I miss you too often Please come home soon Without you, my dear It is so dreadful here I get stuck in my head And trapped in my room SWD 10/2016

I will never understand how people live without a pet

A cat’s meow from the other room Will pull me from my blankets More so than my growling stomach A dainty paw kneading my chest Will warm me from within More so than any hot tea ever could A quite chirp and headbutt to my leg Will make me feel at home More so than…